Tales and Art in a Small Scale with a Big Heart

S1E3: Bromance


Ben: “I never thought I’d see the day when you order nothing stronger than a coke in the bar! Wow! Rehab really did you good then, didn’t it?”

Elliot: “Yeah well, I don’t spend five months outta my life for nothin’. I’ve been an absolutist for… mmm… nearly seven months now. And staying that way.”

Ben: “That’s big of you, man! Now we just need to find that drummer, and we’re good.”


Ben: “About yesterday still… I can’t believe it. So the hot photographer chick asked you to do a private striptease for her at your home, and you still couldn’t get her to stay over night! Seriously?! I’m about to die with laughter!”

Elliot: “Oh man, drop it already, will ya? I should have told you fuckin’ nothin’.”

Ben: “And that was like the second time you asked her for that already! Buahhahaa!”


Elliot: “I didn’t ask, technically. You make me sound like I was begging…”

Ben: “‘Cause you were!”

Elliot: “No! I would never ask a girl to do anything she ain’t completely, perfectly sure about. I don’t pressure, I hint. Besides, I know Choco well enough to read between the lines…”

Ben: “Choco, huh? So you really like giving those goddamn nicknames… Or have you got a history with her? You know, you’re not gonna get far with your hinting technique.”


Elliot: “Yeah, well… There’s nothing I can do about that. I just let things go as they are meant to. I don’t wanna tease fate too much. To answer to your question: yes, I was friends with Choco… and more than just friends for a short period of time. But that was years ago… Just before I met you.”

Ben: “Uh, sorry. What happened?”

Elliot: “She dumped me when she got tired of my drug abuse which had almost accidentally killed her. There. Now do you get why I don’t wanna pressure her into anything?”

Ben (stares into the distance with blank eyes): “Oh man… But you don’t use that stuff anymore, right?”

Elliot (quietly): “Sometimes… Please don’t say anything to her. I’m just glad to be friends with her again, and I don’t want anything to spoil it.”


Later at Elliot’s…

Ben (eyes wide open): “What the hell…”

Elliot (singing in a VERY high voice):

“Lu li luu lay-eh, lu li luu lay-eh 
The eagle hath borne my mate up in the sky 
To lyeth him in her nest on a mountain high 
And at his home kneeleth a maid 
As the littlelings eyt him away 
Both night and day 
What more can I say-eh?

Ben: “Could you mute that shower singing a bit, pleeease? I can’t hear my thoughts.”

Elliot: “Lu li luu lay-eh, lu li luu lay-eh… WHAT?! I didn’t hear ya!”


Five minutes later…

Elliot: “You were saying what?”

Ben: “Don’t matter anymore. Are you writing your memoirs or what? Don’t you think you’re a bit young for that at 27? Or are you planning on dying soon? You haven’t seen nothing ye…”

Elliot: “Where’d you get it? Gimme that!”

Ben: “Not until you tell me what it is!”

Elliot: “It’s not about me. I just…”

Ben: “Hah! Don’t give me that crap, suckeeeer!”


Elliot: “You know I always carry a notebook with me so I can doodle and write whatever comes to mind. This is just one o’ them books.”

Ben: “I know, but you’ve been writing some really freaky stuff!”

Elliot: “You read it all?! You son of a bitch! It’s not even finished!”

Ben: “Clearly, but I can see where it’s heading. Wanna tell me more about it?”

Elliot (tiredly): “Maybe someday… Not now…”

Ben: “At least tell me more about that Choco girl. Something about her puzzles me.”


Elliot: “You wanna date her? Fine! I approve. She’s a nice girl.”

Ben: “I might wanna, but I happen to know that you fancy her yourself! Based on what I just read… If it went like I think it went… The girl in the book is her!”

Elliot (irritated): “Nothing can or will never happen between me and Choco. She’s yours for all I care…”

Ben: “But you do! That’s what I’m saying. You don’t go through something like that with somebody and then stop caring. Not even if she does. I’ve been meaning to ask you: why did she pretend that she didn’t know you personally years before when I met her the other day? You know, when she pretended to not know what you meant about ‘nussing’ and stuff?”

Elliot: “She’s a professional photographer. She wants to keep her distance…”

Ben: “After that thing that happened between you two?”

Elliot (interrupting): “When did you become my personal shrink anyway, Boniface?”

Ben: “Er, the day we met?”


Elliot: “HERE! You take this! I now pronounce you my personal, qualified shrink, Mr. Boniface Deerman or whatever your surname was.”

Ben: “You what?”

Elliot: “You heard. I’m giving you a bass, bassist!”

Ben: “You’re gonna regret this… Are you crazy? You spent a small fortune on this beauty…”

Elliot: “You’re my shrink. You should know how crazy I am. Plus, you are my bassist after all. If we’re gonna make some beautiful music together, you should have the best guitar for it. I don’t need this. I’ve got so many guitars already I don’t have room for them all, baby.”

Ben: “Goddamnit! I’m speechless… Are you sure you’re not on something?”

Elliot: “Yeaaah… I mean: I ain’t.”

Ben: “Not sure?”

Elliot: “No, I mean: I’m as sane as I can be.”

*High five*

Ben: “Yep, I just had to make sure. Hahaha! Seriously… I’d give you a bear hug right now if you weren’t all wet!”

Elliot: “Whaaat? You didn’t just say that, brah! Those walls are surprisingly thin. Don’t shock the neighbors.”

Ben: “The rodents you mean… Thank you SO much for this!”

Elliot (in a high voice): “Don’t insult my neighbors! And you’re totally welcome. I thought it would make you stop asking about my book, and it did. Yessh!”

Ben (cheerfully): “You’re such an idiot!”

Elliot: “I appreciate your diagnosis, doc, and will take the medicine without protest.”


To be continued…

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